Two Months, One Post Redux

Howdy all!

Once again the time has whizzed past me and I find myself scrabbling to get something posted. Please do not take my lack of monthly posts as disinterest in keeping everyone informed about the happenings here in San Diego. I see the blog as an important way to keep the many scattered people of our tribe in the know and make sure you don't miss out on any key events. I just find myself losing track of the time and a month slips past me.

The first order of business is we're still in escrow on the Seminole Drive property. Yes it has been over 5 months and yes we're feeling the strain of that. If this property was not absolutely perfect for our big Queer Village we wouldn't still be here waiting to see what happens. The seller is now trying their last ditch efforts to get financing for the sale. The property itself is fairly unique and that's what keeps getting us rejected. If anyone has any real estate mojo please send it our way, we need every little bit of good intentions you can spare to push this through.

We had a black out here in San Diego which you may or may not of heard of in the news. It started with a few panicked folks in the family but quickly turned into an impromptu dinner by candle light with us sitting in the cool night air and star gazing. We pulled out our crank radio to listen to the hysteria fueled reporting that stressed to us that "this was NOT a terrorist attack" and to "remain calm". The kids ran around with flashlights and we shifted ice from the freezer outside to the fridge to keep our perishables from perishing. We snacked and played with the kids till bedtime and then the adults sat in the front yard and chatted the hours away. It was decided to have a sleep over with the families so we all bunkered down for the night. All in all it was a wonderful experience that the kids loved and the adults cherished.

The kids started school - Tre in the 1st grade, Nani in Kinder and Sidhha moved to the Otters room at the SDSU Children's Center. Tre's new teacher - Mrs. Curtis - is wonderful. We are relieved and grateful that we got a better match than we did in Kinder. She seems very competent and has a steady presence in the classroom. She knows how to handle energetic boys and we haven't gotten a trace of any prejudice towards him or his family. Nani was overjoyed to be placed in Mrs. Webb's class since she was Tre's teacher last year but the parents not so much. Though she will thrive I think with Mrs. Webb since Nani fits the model of what a student should be for her class, the girls are less than excited about her lack of enthusiasm and inability to handle a way range of kids. We are all grateful this is her last year of teaching and that Siddha will have no chance of being placed with her. Speaking of the Bean, she moved with Mr. David and the rest of her classmates to the toddler room and seems to be making a smooth transition. The classroom is very different from the infant cottage rooms. There are interactive elements all over the place - a light board, various sensory tables, books, toys and art centers. The outdoor area is equally stimulant laden. Overall everyone is off to a good start with the school year.

The dads went on a fabulous trip to Las Vegas! We were in town to see some friend visiting from the Midwest and the East Coast who were in town for a podcasting event so we decided to pop out and say hello. It synced up with Vegas Gay Pride so it was a double word score for us. The hotel, the Paris, was wonderful and charming with a great buffet to boot. We saw Zumanity, a local troupe of the Cirque de Soliel and a great female impersonator show called Divas. We went to the Pride Parade and then dancing afterwards with a great drag show and incredible go-go dancers. We stayed up late, ate great food and slept till noon. We talked and talked as well which was a huge treat for us. We struggle to find significant amounts of time to talk to each other about our happenings and what's going on in our heads. Thanks to the girls for watching the kids and making the weekend away possible.

I passed three kidney stones and if you were around for the last time it was much the same. Unrelenting pain, drugs, and nausea. Rinse and repeat - that was a week of my life. Back to the doctor's to see what we need to do to stop this from happening - not looking to make it a part of my yearly planner.

Halloween and October is a busy time for us. We do the Family Matters Halloween Carnival, the Boo Parade and it's festival, trick or treating and decorating the girl's pass for passing out candy plus no fewer than 5 family birthdays. This year Nani was a fairy princess, Siddha was a dragon and a fairy while Tre was Pocoyo and Dan (a character from Bakukan). The dads wore Mardi Gras masks for one dress up event and wings to be fairy daddies for another. Lisa did a great gypsy mystic and Monica was a radical fairy with a great dress. I will try to get the pictures up from the events up on Flickr in the next week or so for your viewing pleasure.

We had a great dinner out with my dad for his birthday at City Deli in Hillcrest. He was tickled pink to get his birthday cards as a Grandad. He seems to have taken to the new role of Grandparent and it's great to see him light up when he sees the kids. We got him a balloon bundle as large as him and had a lovely dinner chatting and laughing. Tre got to pick music off a juke box and Siddha got to eat pickles which made the night a roaring success for her.

Lisa had a great dinner at Dumpling Inn, a feast of dumplings and other dishes. The place is tiny and we took over 1/4 of the joint with our celebration of her birth. Siddha spent the night sitting on my lap - feeding herself and me throughout the meal. My shorts were soaked through with soup from being spoon fed by her. Tre was an incredibly brave eater, a real risk taker for him. He tried everything at the table and even asked for more of most of it. Nani was her usual happy self and happily ate dumplings while chatting with the family.

Larry had his birthday at the beginning of October and we went to Kous Kous, a local Moroccan restaurant that's in the basement of an office building in Hillcrest. The decor is rich and colorful, fabric everywhere and dark woods. We had a large table and enjoyed great food, service and company. The kids had a great time as well which was a surprise. The place isn't exactly child friendly but they all enjoyed it. Tre was open to the new food, Nani was ok with sharing her moms with the other guests and Siddha was very patient as the food was brought out. We sipped tea, nibbled on delicacies, and had a lively conversation throughout. A wonderful evening to celebrate a wonderful man.

Lisa, Monica and I went to the Bead & Gem Faire up in Del Mar. It's great to have others who share my passion and love of the event. We drove up and wandered for hours amongst the booths and vendors. I found several great bargains and the items I needed to complete several projects - a number of which were Christmas gifts. Lisa and Monica experienced equal measures of success on their shipping forays. We all drove back sharing our bargains and acquisitions . I look forward to the next time it's in town.

That's it for now from us. We still wait to see what will happen with Seminole. We are gearing up for Thanksgiving and Christmas here. We host several large gatherings at the end of the year so please let us know if you can make any of them. Thanksgiving dinner, the Tree Decorating Party, Christmas Cookie Bake Off, Christmas Eve Dinner or Christmas Day Dinner and of course, the New Year's Eve Party. Come one and come all - we love to host you and see you.

Hopefully I will post before next year. Keep your fingers crossed. :)

Two Months, One Post

Sorry for missing last month's blog entry. I got swept along in all the happenings here at the house and with our family that I lost track of the time.

First, we still don't have the house at Seminole Drive yet but we are throwing everything we got at it right now. Sadly, the options have been whittled down and we're only left with a few more things left to try and then it's done and over with. Though honestly we can say that we tried our hardest to secure the place for our families and can walk away feeling emotionally in the clear about it. We are beginning to compile a new list of houses to start looking at next week so we can keep the momentum going on finding a place for the tribe to settle in the near future.

We took a trip to Gearhart, Oregon this month and had a freaking fantastic time with the Calohs. We arrived in Portland and stayed a night with Carol, Bill's sister and got a chance to see their new old house (long story) while she and Jay got a chance to spend time with the rest of the family especially the kids. Our dinner was at a group of gourmet food trucks which are popular in the city or so we have been told. The next morning we ate blueberry pancakes while visiting with Lydia, Carol's daughter who dropped by for breakfast. After that we headed out to OMSI for the morning.

The kids had a fabulous time wandering there for most of the day. They checked a bunch of exhibits out - an submarine that was parked in the river nearby, a Narnia exhibit with armor and costumes, and a huge hall dedicated to video games and their history. We grabbed some lunch there and Grammie Jo joined us in Portland as well as meeting up with some local friends. After lunch we hung out a little while longer then packed everyone up to head up the coast to Gearhart.

We stayed at Gearhart by the Sea for a week. Bill, Larry and I had stayed there before for two different family reunions and really enjoyed our time. In particular, staying in the Pacific Terrace section. If you look on the facilities tab then click View Facility Map - we were in number 401 so right out our back door was some grass then the beach. It was an incredible view of the sky and just open space. Everyone got to just relax and enjoy the company. The week itself passed slowly so you really could feel the time spent there and it was marvelous.

While we were there we did some berry picking (Lisa is a crazed were-bear about berries), bonfire and home made caramel corn (thanks Grammie Joe) on the beach, kite flying, jam and syrup making (thanks to Lisa), some outlet shopping, excursions to the beach itself, rode a 6 person bike around Seaside, swimming, and great home cooked dinners in the evenings. Napping and catching up on lost sleep was also an activity pursued with some vigor. All in all it was an auspicious first Big Family vacation. The kids watched a bunch of Hayao Miyazaki animated films we bought just for the trip. Kiki's Delivery Service, Ponyo, and My Neighbor Totoro to name a few.

We also had Pride since last I posted. We marched with the Center again this year as part of the Family Matters contingent. The kids rode bikes or in wagons while adults supervised. This year was the 1st time military personnel marched openly as their own group and while I am not a big fan of the armed forces it was uplifting to see my queer people proud and acknowledged. There were veterans and the currently enlisted, running the whole spectrum of age as well as the transgendered. It was a gift to be there for that moment and to be able to say I was there and share with others who were not.

We camped in the Children's Garden at the festival after the parade, grabbing some food from the incredible selection of vendors then watched the kids play. play and play some more. Our group got very musical this year with dancing and karaoke at a small dance floor they have set up. Hula hoops were employed to maximum effect and face painting was enjoyed. As always it was gratifying to see other families and their children in the queer space and meet up with all the other parents we know raising queerspawn in the San Diego area. Granddad Don and Pappi Michael came by and visited as well as others. It was a long and enjoyable day.

My sister was also out for a visit for about a week with her family including the newest member AJ. They stayed with us so the cousins got plenty of time to reconnect and foster their relationships to each other. My sister cooked the dinners while she was here and we all ate like gods. The woman can cook and we can eat! Her kids are sooooooo much bigger now and really coming into their own personalties and identities. We also got the chance to meet Hugo, AJ's dad since he came along for the visit. It was great to finally meet him as well. AJ was cute in that way that only a baby can be. I was happy they made the drive out from Texas to see us.

Tre was promoted to 1st grade at Birney where his class did a musical number. He got great marks all around with an advanced mark in Reading (thanks Sylvan Learning Center) and immediately following the promotion there was an outdoor picnic with food and games. He was excited to be a 1st grader and of course it also meant he was going to go to camp. Both he and Nani went to Camp Cahito this summer vacation in Balboa Park. They did archery, cooking, and survival skills while there. They come home caked in mud and dirt so they seem to be having the times of their lives. Several of their friends also attended: Nia, Nathaniel, and Gabriel were a few that were there as well.

Siddha moved to the Otters classroom at the SDSU Children's Center and made a relatively smooth transition. The room is definitely more toddler geared - the things to interact with boggles the mind. It feels like a brain growing room with adults in it. It's great to see her make friends and continue to develop her language skills. She is throwing out words left and right along with what we think our sentences but we haven't quite grasped all her vocabulary.

This summer also had swim lessons for Tre (I told you we were busy) at the Murray Callan swim school in Pacific Beach. He was there with Emma, Nathaniel and Nia. He only took one lesson to remember everything he had learned last summer and then he was off picking up new stuff like diving and different methods of swimming. It was great to hang out with the adults as well in one of those rare moments where someone else was watching our children. I think next year the Bean will be joining the swim crowd for lessons and maybe a way to get some daddy time in for her.

The last bit is the departure of Dan and Megan for their move to Portland, Oregon. We had a good bye dinner last night at Hash House with the whole family to wish them well on their new home and city. Dan got this very sweet and touching tattoo of the silhouettes of everyone in the family in chronological order that Megan drew. He unveiled it at dinner and it was beautiful. It has been awesome having them here while the kids were young and having them be a part of family traditions. I feel so confident now that the children will know and feel connected to two people I respect and admire so much. If you're in Portland let us know and we'll make introductions.

That's everything and I have learned not to skip a month because my fingers hurt. :) I have pictures from all the events mentioned above and will do my best to get them loaded up to Flickr in the near future as well as some older photos that we got scanned and preserved. Shots of us as kids and our pre-child lives. I hope everyone is well and as usual we welcome visitors!

Still Waiting

Howdy all!

As the title says we're still waiting for close escrow on the Seminole Drive house. We hit a snag with the bank, appraisers and the seller. At this point we have to wait for them all to work it out and then get back to us. We're still pretty positive about getting the place just have to wait them out and let them iron out the details between themselves. We did all the inspections and while the house needs some minor repairs, there was nothing that popped up to deter from staying in escrow. Keep your fingers crossed for them to get it all settled and us closing in the next few weeks.

We had the Bean's birthday as I mentioned at Kid Ventures and I we're for sure going back next year. It was the best kids birthday party we've had. You show up and they do everything else. You actually get to visit with the other parents and interact with the kids during the party. They did games with the kids and adults throughout the party. We had access to a coffee bar so parents could stay caffeinated and hydrated. All the kids loved the castle, pirate ship, grocery store, disco, fire station and climbing wall. All the areas had chests filled with dress up clothes matched the nearby play structure so we soon had pirates, princesses, disco divas and knights running around the party. The staff moved the party to the cake and candle blowing easily. Then at the party's end they had all her gifts loaded up in a wagon for us to wheel out to the car. It was so effortlessly and easy. We loved it! Consider this a recommendation for Kid Ventures.

We took the kids to the Del Mar Fair again this year. It was Siddha's first time and Tre's second. Tre actually performed at the fair with Heartlight - an after school dance aerobics program for elementary age children. He did a great job and danced on stage for his whole family. Don't worry we took video and picture of it. He was so proud that he was able to provide his own ticket for the fair along with one dad. The parking space we were provided was perfect - right outside the gate so it was an easy walk after a day of fair games and rides. The Calohs joined us though Siddha had to leave a little early since the fair was a bit much for her after awhile though she had a great time running around right at the opening when they were hardly any crowds. Prizes were won and fair food eaten. All in all a great time. Check out my Facebook page for pictures of the kids at the fair.

Father's Day was excellent. Lisa, Leng and Monica made us an incredible spread for brunch. We had three types of sausage, waffles, crepes with sweet and savory options, scrambled eggs, and three different juices. Check out Bill's Facebook page for a picture of the spread. We got some rocking gifts including the book Go the Fuck to Sleep. Check out an excerpt from the same book being read by Samuel L Jackson on the Letterman show. We also got a book of excerpts from the website Sh*t My Kids Ruined which is a pleasure to read especially if you have children possessed of boundless energy and limited sense. We also got a delightful book of.....what we'll call Daddy exercises to try at home in the privacy of one's bedroom. After that fabulous brunch we packed all the siblings up and headed down to the Southwestern Yacht Club to have an early dinner with my dad. The kids had a great time running around my dad's boat and playing all over it. The food was wonderful and it was a relaxing time with my dad and Michael. I put up photos from that day as well on Facebook so feel free to check for them.

Bill and I celebrated our 14th anniversary by going to Big Cat Cabin in Julian for a weekend. Many thanks to Larry for working out the time and childcare coverage for us to go. We slept (which was heavenly), read and bopped into town for some used bookstore shopping and picked up goodies for everyone back home. It was sweet to be back in a pre-kid Bill and Torrey space for a few days. We talked and soaked in claw foot tubs, watched movies snuggled under comforters and cooked meals for one another. A great way to reconnect and relax.

Lisa and I have taken several field trips to various city offices to look up permitting and zoning on the Seminole property. We have encountered the usual colorful group of city/state employees and actually had some great lunch time chats after. Thanks out to Monica for helping out with Nani so we could brave the bureaucracy. It looks like all our future plans for the lot are doable. The Calohs can build their home and a home for Leng's parents. All our additions are permitted and legal.

We've began to purge in preparations for the move to the new house - whatever new house it turns out to be. If for some reason this place falls out of escrow we're going to continue to look for a bigger place. So we have begun going room to room and touching everything to make sure its something we need and want so we don't pack up things and move them only to get rid of them at the new place. Once again Monica (she's a heroine) has been a great help with the purging and cleaning. We have already starting up the donations runs of toys, clothing and the odd bit of furniture to various charities in town.

As always please feel free to stop by for a visit - we welcome the company!

McMansions & Compounds

Back again for the monthly update of the Stouder-Studenmund family. As we have been saying for some time we need a bigger house and more bathrooms - please more bathrooms. Well we were on the remodel track with our current house and were getting everything laid out and in place when we started having some talks with the Calohs (Leng, Lisa & Nani) about our vision of a blended family.

Now for most people reading this I feel fairly confident that you know what I mean by "blended family" but just in case I have a new reader present I will explain. We started having kids faced with the common many queers face when deciding to reproduce - how? Lacking key elements to do so you are required to branch out to many different solutions - surrogacy, domestic adoption vs. international adoption, foster to adopt, etc. We talked and talked and talked and talked till we decided to do a blend of a lot of different things. We adopted Tre as a foster to adopt child and we used surrogacy for Nani and Siddha. So we have children sort of blurring the lines between the two families. We are mothers and fathers - aunts and uncles - primary and secondary caregivers - you get the picture. Our Queer Village.

So discussing our vision of a blended family we came back to the idea which has stuck with us of having a living situation where the kids flow naturally and effortlessly from one house to the next. So Leng did a search and found a property - 4848 Seminole Drive - it is perfect for our needs. The house is wonderful and has plenty of space for everyone including our newest addition to the family - Monica. Bathrooms to preserve the peace and plenty of room on the lot for the Calohs to build another house on it. It's still in incorporated San Diego and not very far from our current house. Further signs things are falling into place is my father needing a new place to live in the near future so we can rent this house to him without a lot of frustration or uncertainty of renting to strangers. Long story short we have put in a bid for the property and hopefully next month my blog post will be about us moving in.

This has made us realize that if we remodel this place into a McMansion - we will have no further room to grow except up to a 3rd story so getting a bigger place is the new action plan. Our hope is this place since it is zoned and has the room for the Calohs to build on so keep your fingers crossed for us. The decision to move has brought with it a series of necessary but unpleasant tasks such as purging the house of clutter and packing up with kids in tow but it is the best course of action so away we go!

We went to Nathaniel's 5th birthday and had a wonderful time. Check Flikcr for the posted pictures from the event. We always enjoy our time with the Musicos and I love seeing our kids together. I'm not sure if our children will be close friends when they grow up but at the very least they will know other people with same type of family and we have other parents to bond with over raising our queerspawn.

We have Siddha's second birthday coming up on Saturday at Kid Ventures. The time continues to zip by and here she is in her full glory as a toddler. She is talking in 3 to 4 words sentences and continues to express herself all over the place. This last weekend Auntie Monica gave her some fresh mint to smell and she wandered through the house to the dads asking them to "smhall" it and putting it under our noses. She is picking up words here and there as we talk with her trying to teach her what things are called. It's a delight to watch her acquire language and a rare joy offered to us in the act of raising her.

Tre has mastered shoe tying and is jubilant about the fact. We have started taking him to the Hillcrest Farmer's Market and letting him learn about commerce. He goes with ten dollars and then has to budget how to spend his money while there. He is learning about bartering, delayed gratification and about how he relates to the people he shops from. All the vendors there have been great. They have answered all his questions and seem delighted to have a young person inquiring about their farms and animals. He is making the connections between himself and the people around him - how him buying things starts a chain reaction of events. Lunch there lets him try to be a more adventurous eater - not one of Tre's strong points but knowing the people has made him more bold and knowing the food was made from ingredients he can see and touch has removed some of his trepidation in trying new foods.

We had a rough patch of about two weeks around Mother's Day but that seems to be smoothing out. We have been acknowledging the feeling but reinforcing the reality of his situation. He wants to hear that Michelle (his birth mother) cared/cares about him which is completely natural but as children his age do he started making things or inventing scenarios that showed what he needed.

Tre: "Michelle came to my 3rd birthday."

Dad: "No bud but I bet she wanted to and if she could've she would have been there."

Tre: "I'm coming to live with Michelle."

Dad: "I bet she would love to have you with her but right now this is the best place for you."

You see the pattern - good news is this is proving to be much easier to deal with then we thought. It seems clear he wants to know he matters to her and that she cares for him. Thanks to trust and love he has for us - telling him how she does care about him addresses that need for him. All the Aunties have been incredibly helpful - having women around him that love and support him goes a long way and we are extremely thankful for their love and devotion.

I wish his teacher could have been more supportive about it. She talked with me about Tre's recent behavior - how he was more fragile lately and prone to acting out with her. I explained that the push at school about Mother's Day (art projects, cards, books, etc) can be harder for an adopted child to which she looked surprised and blinked a few times and replied. "Oh...I hadn't thought of that." In my head I casually reached over and strangled her - ending her and Tre's suffering in one decisive act but instead I said. "Yes as I have mentioned before sometimes Tre's needs and reactions are going to differ due to that fact." I keep telling myself the year with her is almost over and that helps.

Grammy Jo arrives tomorrow afternoon and the kids are excited. As I have said in the past she is a rockstar of a grandparent. She makes time for multiple visits throughout the year and is keenly interested in the kids and getting to know them. We have never seen any difference in the way she relates to any of the children - all of them are her grandkids and they feel that blanket acceptance. We have a couple of activities lined up for her week long stay and we have plans to talk to her about the extra bedroom we have in the new house for her and to make it clear our intention for her to come stay with us when its time. Larry feels very strongly about caring for her like she did him and making a place for her in our lives and the lives of our children. Wish us luck!

That's everything from us here in San Diego - hopefully the next post will be all about the Compound we're trying to buy and build here. :) As always feel free to visit us - the more the merrier!

Spring Break

So this entire month has been Spring Break for us since the kids are on a year round track at school. Tre did a few weeks of an after school program that the Birney offers during the vacations and spent some time just playing at home. It was great timing since A-ma has been here in the states for the entire month as well. They have all gotten time to see her and spend time with her which is always wonderful to see and help be a part of. We took a trip to the zoo, the kids went to the Wild Animal Park and hosted several playdates here with neighborhood kids.

The dads went to Santa Cruz for a long weekend and we had a blast. We saw old friends (thanks for making the time all), ate some great food, bought and read books (a rare treat right now with kids), slept in and saw a movie. We found a hotel that we love and is now our official spot to stay when visiting SC. Though I think we've decided to fly up from now on instead of driving - to get more time on the actual trip without increasing it's length. Many thanks to Lisa, Leng, A-ma and Monica for looking after our children - making the trip possible. It also gave some time to just spend with each other which was awesome. We came back happy and rested dads.

Had my 39th birthday this month and it was just lovely. We went out for dim sum and I was greeted with a HUGE ballon sculpture - really it was bigger than a person. Our friend Joy was down with her daughter so that was an added bonus and my husbands got me an incredible mango cake for the Lemon Grove Bakery - a place we feel in love with when they made our wedding cake. We go there for all our cakes now. I got a great new man-bag or he-purse - happy as can be. I also picked up some new music as well. I am looking forward to 40 since that's the year I get my tattoos.

The night out to see Quidam was awesome and the dinner before hand was great. The evening was filled with conversation, laughter and art so perfection. It had been awhile since we had been out with all the parents and no kids so it was a treat to talk about something other than schedules and current toddler fueled challenges. It's nice to get the balance of your life as a parent and your life as an individual - to able to nurture those relationships that you had outside of family life or at least feeling like you can engage parts of yourself and your experience that is not just about kids. :)

The remodel is chugging along. We have the funds and we're getting our plans updated to bring them up to code. We have narrowed it down to two contractors and just need to talk to them about schedules. Not looking forward to the actual remodel but eager for the extra rooms in the house. We are planning a big purge through out the house to only really have things we need or want in the hopes to really be able to spread things out a little bit more after the remodel. I will be starting the hunt for a storage unit to put things to get them out the way and some posting action on Craigslist to sell off the things we won't need anymore - mostly kitchen items that are included as built ins in the plans. The extra money will help buy new appliances and some decorative items for the new spaces.

Easter was a success. We had a large gathering for brunch with tons of food, Easter baskets, egg hunts (yes plural we attended a few as well), and family bonding. We hosted and the weather was with us and we were able to eat in the backyard. Larry made biscuits and gravy as usual and it was greeted with the usual enthusiasm. We seem to be having a pretty successful time of integrating more of Lisa's family into our holiday gatherings which eases the strain of running from holiday event to holiday event. Nothing like trying to eat multiple Christmas meals or Thanksgiving turkeys. :)

That's it for us - hope everyone had a great Easter and as usual we welcome visitors to the Zoo whenever possible. :)

The Verge of Verbal

As the title says the Bean is just about there for talking and by talking I mean in a way that other people than her primary caregivers can understand. She has been using modified sign language for awhile now with us and at the SDSU Children's Center. She has help, more, done, please, different, movie, eat, milk, sleep, and diaper change. All of which has been incredible helpful when dealing with a spirited young lass such as she. She has now created a modified language for herself and us which includes such phrases as:

"No K K no!" (No cat no)

"Ease!" (please)

"Tae" (Tre)

"Na na" (Nani)

"Da Da" (daddy)

"My uck!" (my duck)

"Ganks!" (thanks)

"Yo!" (yogurt)

"Bah!" (box as in juice box)

"No no no!" (no translation required)

I suspect by next month's post she will be talking in a more conventional manner with us. She is still a passionate little toddler convinced of her own notions and ideas. Daily are the struggles of her versus the objects around her as she attempts to strong arm doors, chairs, cats, people, and vacuums. She has been teething and getting the last few teeth she is missing and as is her way she is doing them in batches - no half steps for our little Bean.

Nani turned 5 and it was glorious! By glorious I mean loud and distinctly geared for the 3-6 age group. We all gathered at Chuck E. Cheese's (I included the link for those readers without small children somewhere in their lives so they behold the wonder that is) and let the giant rat or possibly mouse entertain us. The kids went to a land of light, sound, and sugar that will be long remembered. The parents were sweetly numb by the party's end - having been subdued by the same said light, sound, and sugar. Nani was radiant - that really is the only word for it. She was given a crown and her Auntie Meggie made her a custom order cake with beyblades on top of it. Click to learn more. :) I have uploaded the pictures to Flickr so feel free to take a look. I know will be receiving requests for more parties there in the future. You have been warned.

Tre, we learned this week, is one of the top 2 readers in his class and is proficient in all areas. While we are overjoyed at his progress we know it had little to do with his teacher at this point and we squarely lay the laurel wreaths at his feet, Sylvan Learning Center, and his speech therapist at Birney Elementary. He also received an award for his academic achievements in an assembly. He is on track for 1st grade and during his month off for Spring Break he'll be heading back to Sylvan (when told he danced around and cheered) to focus on his writing and a little more work on his reading skills - more of a refresher with that. He helped raise money for a librarian and an art program at his school (things are grim here for schools and their budgets) by participating in a jog-a-thon. He raised over 100.00 dollars in the event so thanks to family that sponsored him. The Kindergarden classes raised the most money and his classroom was the room that raised the most. Birney did hit the goal and beat it so next year there will be a Librarian and art at his school.

The dads are chugging along. We have a night out planned for this Friday to see Quidam, the newest offering from the Cirque du Soleil. We have enjoyed every tour that we have gotten the chance to see and are excited to see yet another. The mothers Caloh will be joining us along with my dad Don and his partner Michael. We will be having dinner at Kous Kous before the show. Then the following weekend all the dads are packing up the car and heading to Santa Cruz for a long weekend (thanks to the girls plus Monica for taking the kids so we can get away for our yearly dad vacation) of relaxing and catching up with friends. We will make the rounds to the Tea House and Mobo to name a few.

That's all for this month and I hope to report some significant progress on the remodel of the Zoo (1 bathroom for 4 adults and 2 kids is getting a little pinched) when next I post. As always we welcome visitors year round and much love to all!

The Surgical Stouder-Studenmund Family

Well as the title says we had surgeries this month. Tre went in to have his adenoids removed. He has had sinus infections all throughout the year and they have been swelling enough to interfere with his breathing sometimes at night. Nothing like having small heart attacks as you hear your child stop breathing at night. In addition, it gives him gnarly breath sometimes - like a single exhalation can drop small animals at 30 yards. I was concerned about Tre going back to Children's Hospital since that was the place he received treatment for his injuries from the abuse inflicted by his paternal aunt. For the most part he was fine with it except for the IV. He had one almost his entire stay the first time and the one they had put in for his procedure was a focal point of anxiety for him. He didn't really calm back down until they removed it.

Siddha has had back to back ear infections for the last month or so which has lead to a steady diet of antibiotics (not so great for a tiny tummy) which lead to a raging case of dastardly diaper rash. Her bottom was angry and red - took no prisoners as they say. So they put some teeny tiny ear tubes in her ears that will allow them to drain now when she gets an ear infection. Instead of taking a course of antibiotics - she now just needs a few ear drops when we see drainage from her ears. I was a worried about her going under for the first time and whether she would tolerate it well. It appears I had nothing to be concerned about. She was her happy self about 15 minutes after waking up from the procedure. The worst part was watching her get carried off while screaming for us as she made her way to the OR with the nurse. Insert hook just below chest bone and tug sharply.

Right after we had a huge lunch at McDonald's (the nearest eatery to the hospital) since they hadn't been allowed to eat anything since the night before. They were understandable famished and proceeded to eat copious amounts of Mc-food products. We had salads, chicken nuggets, fries, apple slices, burgers, cheese burgers, and yogurt. We ended up going back to the counter to order a second round of food for them. After they ate we headed home for some napping to sleep the rest of the general off (at least for Tre) and then the Aunties with Nani in tow with dinner from a local noodle shop we love. It was awesome to end the day with family and comfort food.

Valentine's Day was very romantic here at the Zoo. All the dads got flowers, cards, sweet kisses and a lovely dinner out. Tre got a box of cards, candy, and home baked goodies. Siddha got to decorate a card for her teachers at the SDSU Children's Center and the opportunity to paw through her siblings collections of cards. We took the kids to the zoo and the older kids loved as usual. It was a treat to see Siddha reallly get into the zoo more this time now that she's a little older. Before we had gone with her but it was mostly her along for the ride - this time it was pointing, screeching and staring at animals with the occasional look back to make sure parents were still around.

We have wrapped up the bids from contractors and are now trying to decide between them all. Both dreading and excited about the remodel. The idea of living in a half deconstructed house sounds stressful but the idea of more than one bathroom is intoxicating. Either way we need the changes to make the house more comfortable for the growing family. Those of you who know her - Monica - will be moving in at the end of the remodel. Which is awesome!! An old chum from high school who I have the chance to reconnect with and has fit in quite nicely with our full moon madness here. She is a regular at family lunch and is also it turn out an incredible sitter who likes kids!! All praise the little gods and goddesses as they smile down on us.

That's all from us for now but next month should be filled with more happenings including Nani's 5th birthday!!! We're going to Chuck E. Cheese's to celebrate and looking forward to seeing all the other families there.

Much love to all.

New Year - Old Plan

So the plan didn't exactly work for the dads to rotate posting to the blog so I am picking up the reins once again and posting this bitch at least once a month.

We had a whirlwind holiday season with Thanksgiving and Christmas going very well. We hosted Lisa's side of the family this Turkey Day and I think it went wonderfully. The food was awesome and everyone really seemed to have a great time together. Here's hoping we can host more often in the upcoming years.

Christmas was incredibly sane - we tried to stick with a reasonable number of presents and it seemed to work for all involved. I admit it was hard at times not to grab the one little gift when I saw something I thought someone would like but I only went over once and it was for my best friend. The gift opening seemed more manageable for the kids and people seem less overwhelmed. The highlight for me was getting a scarf that once belonged to me late Uncle Bobby from my father. Those of you that know the history can imagine the rest.

Grammy Jo was out for a visit and once again it was wonderful. She brought a bunch of things for us from her farm - jams, jerky, and fudge to name a few then proceeded to bake and cook up even more things when she got here. Our gaming group got spoiled with mom treats and snacks while she was out here. She spent time with the kids and they loved having her here. It means the world to us that she makes the time and energy to see them and us.

Larry got promoted at work to Project Manager and is a happy little turtle. He travels more which is not so great sometimes but he is really enjoying doing what he want to school for. He's excited, engaged and loving what he does. A complete change from before he went to school and the lack luster worker drone he was before.

Bill is still happily employed by Apple and thanks to his job there it looks like we have a real shot at doing our remodel this year. He's been an eager man looking over the plans and meeting with contractors. He has renewed his love with Legos and has built a few small pieces and one large Star Wars spaceship. He is been reading a bunch of super geek books lately and quite happy with the new nerdia - something about plotting points and visualizations of points or some such. Email or call Bill for more details. :)

Tre is reading!! Again I say Tre is reading and the world has changed for him. We have had less than tremendous results with his teacher so we went to Sylvan Learning Center and they did right by him tenfold. They saw the same boy we did - who just needed a little more patience and a understanding and PRESTO he reads. I have battled the school to remove some elements from his IEP - to the point where the district psychologist came out to evaluate him and that put an end to some of the foolishness from his teacher. He is reading to us, to his sisters, and almost anything he can at this point. He is as social as ever and one area I think I will ever really be concerned about with him - he makes friends effortlessly and seems to do well in most social groupings. He's daddy's little social butterfly. :)

Siddha is walking, signing and talking. Not full sentences yet but so close. She is communicating and has really begun to show how interconnected things are for her now at this age. She understands it's time to go to school, that we go to get Tre in the afternoons and that Daddy Larry comes home in the evening. She anticipates events and structures her experience of things. She has a checklist - get home, see who's here, watch a movie then have a snack. She is still a firecracker and has the temper you wouldn't believe. Our most recent example was at one of favorite Japanese eateries she was trying to get a bean out of its shell and was having the hardest time with it. She was sitting between Larry and myself - we both asked her if we could help and she just ignored us. Her face scrunched up and she literally tried to crush the bean in her hand into submission with a battle cry like the Samurai of old as she did so. Our half of the table all stopped talking to watch her titanic effort - only after she had tried did she relent and let us help her. The SDSU Children's Center is still an awesome place and we couldn't be happier with her there.

That's all for now but like I stated above I am going to try to post once a month minimum but I have some free time in the next few weeks to try and fill in the gaps from before. Thanks to everyone who hung in there and completely understandable if you stopped checking. I'll send out something to let everyone know the blog is back.

Also check out our Flickr link- I have put a bunch of photos up recently.

Ciao all!